Tucker Max doesn't like questions about Carolla

At the outset, I must apologize for my lack of posting. It's pretty embarrassing how long my posts take me, considering they are often devoid of anything funny and/or interesting. Plus, I have more at stake now, since if I piss Jessica off by writing about my opinions of her choices in television and movies, I'll end up sleeping on the couch. I'll ease back into writing more frequently and hopefully you'll end up enjoying it.

And now for my Tucker Max story: If you don't know who he is, a little background. He gained a modest amount of internet fame for a story involving an ex-girlfriend after she sued him to remove the story from his site. He won the case and made some headlines since it was an early 1st amendment case involving the internet. He parlayed that fame into a book and a long line of doucher fans. He now has a movie. Tucker's promises of the movie included that it would be a revolutionary comedy, feature no hijinks, an original story, fully formed characters and be a box office hit. Tucker also frequently commented that his movie would top any box office number The Hangover could do. Of course, The Hangover has gone on to be the biggest R rated comedy ever.

I followed the movie production blog and was excited to see that Tucker would be traveling to Norman amongst his 31 city tour to premiere the movie. The movie looked terrible based on the script and trailer, so needless to say I couldn't wait for it. My love of bad movies has long been chronicled on this page and Tucker's seemed poised to join the pantheon.

Here's the set up: the premiere featured Tucker and writing partner Nils Parker (doing an opening, plus aftershow Q&A), plus a free shirt, beer glass, bumper sticker, movie poster, bag, pen, bottle opener and a WWTD wristband, plus movie admission for $10. So basically for the price of an evening movie. I was ecstatic over the possibilities.

Before I get to my review of the movie, here's the Carolla story: After watching the movie, I wanted to ask a question about a scene where the Tucker character says the title of the movie, I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, at what is supposed to be the climatic scene, where Tucker realizes the error of his ways. Carolla has long insisted that this is the tell tale sign of a bad movie, that a character says the title in an obvious way. (See my post about The Ugly Truth). So, I stood up to ask about it, but didn't get to finish my question, because as soon as I said it was Carolla's theory, Tucker freaked out and started making comments about how bad Carolla's movie was and how it didn't make any money. I didn't even get to mention how Nic Cage's character dramatically says he wants to take John Travolta's face....off in the movie Face/Off! Of course his reaction had nothing to do with my question and just illustrated how insecure Tucker really is. The amazing part was that he went on to list how his movie is so different than every other Hollywood comedy. Problem is it is a completely derivative movie. The premise is a bachelor party, something goes wrong, a lesson is learned and the lead saves the day. Not exactly original. Plus one of his friends falls for the stripper with the heart of gold. (his friend is also the most insecure, woman hating person in the movie; He thinks all woman are whores, yet falls for the stripper after insulting her for 20 minutes. We are supposed to believe this is realistic since the stripper says she didn't cheat on her baby daddy?) There is also scene in which a character mentions a scene from Wedding Crashers, then proceeds to put eye drops in Tucker's beer, just like Wedding Crashers. Then we get to see the results of the prank. When I say see them, I mean that literally. They literally show the dude's butt as it is spraying poop. Very classy. Plus I'm pretty sure it doesn't count as being original when you steal a bit from a movie and just add seeing actual shit instead of just seeing a guy in the bathroom.

My review of the movie: It is flat terrible. And not terrible in a fun, let's watch it on cable and crack jokes with buddies kind of way. It's just bad, unfunny and poorly done.

Lastly, Tucker made fun of how bad Carolla's movie was. Just for comparision's sake, here's the Rotten Tomatoes links to each:
Carolla
Tucker

I'll take Carolla's 71, vs. Tucker's 22 and falling any day. I suggest you avoid the movie at all costs.

Jess and I have tickets to Journey next week. Expect a lot of posts involving this.