Worlds Colliding (Day 74)

As Constanza once said to Jerry, it's dangerous when worlds collide. That is exactly what has happened today. Stryker is on Charm School and the dude that plays Mike from My Boys (Jamie Kaler) was on Ace's podcast. Oh my. How in the world am I not supposed to comment on that? Jessica makes me watch My Boys and I can say it is the least funny sitcom ever. I have honestly laughed 3 times over the course of the entire series. I will laugh more on my hundredth viewing of Fire Birds (which is not a comedy) than I do at the entire catalog of My Boys. That's not good. My latest theory with My Boys is that they write down 3 lines of dialogue, put it in a hat, then pick it at random to film the scene. The show has no structure and ends segments without jokes and abruptly.

Jessica wanted to watch the new season of Charm School featuring the skanks of Rock of Love Bus and Real Chance of Love. As soon as Jessica saw Stryker on Charm School she was trying to goad me into talking about him since he replaced Ace on Loveline. Well, I shouldn't really say replaced, since Styrker is a complete tool. Anyway, the show has potential. It is always good times when crazy skanks compete for money by pretending to be ladies.

I have been meaning to talk about this for awhile. I have an embarrassing issue. When I am getting my iPod out and am primed to listen to Ace's wisdom I sometimes accidentally hit the enter button the home screen. Whenever I do that, my iPod plays the first song alphabetically. Readers, here is the embarrassing part. That first song is "Dancing Queen" by ABBA. I know, it's horrific. I really need to find some band that comes before ABBA alphabetically. I defy anyone to think of a worse song to randomly start playing when all you want to listen to is Ace. Can't be topped.

Jessica is making me watch the 2 hour season finale of Grey's Anatomy. The only good thing about the show is that the red headed doctor and Pat Dempsey were in "Made of Honor" together and makes me think of this. And that is amazing. I want to make a list of things I would rather do than watch 2 hours of that terrible show (Is there a worse looking star of a major television show Meredith Grey?);
1. Hold every poisonous snake in the world at the same time. (I can't even watch snakes on television without freaking out).
2. Eat a combination of ranch, ketchup and mustard.
3. Hit myself with a sledgehammer until I pass out;
4. Only being able to listen to 98 Degrees music for the rest of my life;
and
5. Replicate every one of Kenyon Martin's tattoos on my own body.
I will never understand the appeal of the show. It is a whiny, unattractive chick complaining all the time. The hospital is like Bayside since it revolves around 6 people, except it doesn't even have the comedy of the random twins that are in every background shot. (By the way, is there some mechanism for finding those girls? Wouldn't it be amazing to be friends with them? I always wanted to find them and try to date one (even though they aren't attractive) just so I could say I did). The story lines are completely predictable and F'ed out. I mean, come on, how many traumas can happen in Seattle? I am still waiting for a comet to be on course for Seattle and the only thing that can save the city is Pat Dempsey's 5 o'clock shadow. That will probably be a 3 part special.

Wish me luck as I struggle through this crap. Until next time, Mahalo!